There are a lot of products out there based on boobs which means that there are also a lot of retarded products out there based on boobs. Here are my top 5 retarded boob products that I found on Amazon last night.
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#5 – Pin The Boobs On The Babe Game
The description: Remember pin the tail on the donkey? now you can pin the boobs on the babe. Perfect for all adult parties, includes 24 x 36 color poster of the babe…and nine outraqeous boobs covering themes. My take: Exactly which adult parties are we talking about? The kind where you have a nice dinner, a bottle of wine, discussions on politics and a game of pin the boobs on the babe? Exactly which party would this be appropriate for? College parties? that would just be pathetic for a group of guys to sit around and try to pin boobs on a babe instead of you know.. going out to find real babes! |
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#4 – Boob Ball Christmas Ornament
The description: None My Take: Nothing makes christmas more special than a single boob hanging from a tree. I guess it would be a bit better if you had two so it would at least be a pair of boobs but then again.. not really. At least whoever made this product made sure they had all their bases covered because if you prefer a black boob on your tree you can get the Boob Ball African American Ornament instead. |
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#3 – Boob Whistle
The description: None My Take: I’m not sure why anyone would opt to buy a boob whistle as opposed to a regular whistle.. and why does the whistle have eyes and a mouth? Just weird. The only redeeming quality about this product is the tag line “Blow Me!” which is mildly amusing.. it would’ve been funnier if it was a cock whistle though. |
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#2 – Boob Head Mask
The description: None My Take: Halloween is coming up and if you’ve been looking for a great costume then why not go as a freakish man with a pair of boobs growing out of his face? I’m not sure what they were thinking when they designed this, a man with boobs on his face would make a great TLC show though. |
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#1 – Giant Boob Costume
The description: Forget about Tokyo! You’ll be able to tune in Pluto when you don one of our giant boobs! Double your fun and create a hilarious riot at the party by grabbing a bosom buddy and going as a pair! Make sure to give your new found womanhood a more voluptuous look by stuffing the costume with a lightweight fabric or grocery store bags. Costume includes squeaking nipple for that all around titillating experience. My Take: It just looks retarded.. kind of like the guy modeling the costume. Do you really want to be that guy? Didn’t think so. |